Arsenal 0 – 0 Manchester City. Goalless, but funny.

April 26, 2010 20 Comments by Sian

Uninspiring match= struggling to find the inspiration to write about it. Funny really, as there were certainly plenty of talking points. I listed these talking points when I originally tried to attempt writing this blog post yesterday afternoon. This was my unedited summarisation of 98 minutes in the sun on Saturday afternoon:

1.) Vieira/Toure return

2.) Bellamy smack

3.) Adebayor boos

4.) Eboue posters

5.) Silvestre performance

6.) Alex Song ‘lone wolf’

7.) Ref being a dick

8.) Shay Given injury

9.) Standard Sol brilliance

 About right, no? Pity there’s no “Campbell hat-trick” or “Fabianski super save” in there but we were playing against one of the most expensively assembled football teams in the Premiership and one that beat us 4-2 at their ground back in September, so beggars can’t be choosers. Anyway, to summarise the match I thought we were actually very good. I can’t think of anyone who had a truly bad game whereas this time last week we were struggling to find a man who had a good one. Or indeed showed up at all. Bloody Wigan.

The fact was that we didn’t finish very well but didn’t really have the opportunity to finish at all. Every time someone got anywhere near the general vicinity of the goal, there were 25 bruisers wearing black on them. Despite some charming little runs, Theo struggled to provide much of an attacking force and RVP the same. No one missed sitters because there just weren’t really very many opportunities for them to miss them.

Manchester City were thrilled with their goalless draw. I can’t decide if I’d rather see Tottenham or them get fourth. On the one hand, Man City will then have the funds and the credibility to buy lots of top players with the promise of European football if they get fourth but on the other hand, I despise many Tottenham fans with all my being. Although in fairness it’s mostly pity I hold for them and their ever-blistered knuckles. It’s such a conundrum. Who would you go for?

Anyway, back to the list of match highlights. Like I said, there weren’t many and when you’re including a crocked goalkeeper who looked to be in a very lot of pain, you know how free of intrigue the match was in general. But let us go forth anyhow. (ha, as opposed to ‘go fourth’… aren’t I witty?)

Vieira/Toure return

As expected, both Patsy V and…er… Koko T were very warmly received into the bosom of the Emirates faithful. I thought the match was going to be horrendous for me as Patrick was my first love in football, the first name I had on my shirt and the man who got me loving football when I was 9 and went from being a nerdy little girl to a nerdy little girl who could out-talk the majority of her male classmates at football. OH the street cred that brings! It was lovely to hear everyone singing “He comes from Senegal, he plays for Arsenal” again (in your face, Man City, you can get as rich as you like but Pats will never have been born in San Mitty or somewhere else that might rhyme). It was also lovely to see everyone on their feet for Kolo when he made his good luck run towards the penalty area when we swapped ends at half time. Other than that, though, they did not impress me at all. I know we loved Pats and his up-for-it self when he played for us but both of them were big fat bullies for most of this match. Their surrounding of the referee became a bit of a joke at times although I admit, I kind of wanted to surround Mike Dean at some points too. With a lasso. Would have been nice if Pats had come back out afterwards as well. He knows we’re his first, last and only true love in life, so a little clap from the big chap would have gone a long way.

Bellamy smack

He truly is a beast, this one. I’d say it’s the tattoos that make him look such a thug, but it’s not. He’d look a thug wearing a pink all-in-one and bunny ears. He couldn’t resist a little bit of argy-bargy with Alex Song (who has better hair than him), and I think congratulations are in order to Alex Song for barely reacting at all. Obviously Bellamy didn’t get a card though. The Man City players struggled about as hard as a person with really bad credit to get a card of any sort on Saturday afternoon.

Adebayor boos

Oh, weren’t these LOL-some! Deserved, too. I didn’t join in, largely because I was too busy giggling and also don’t think he’s worth the effort but the venom in the air was almost visible, like little droplets of disgust. HOW much of a numpty did he look in his pigtails, by the way? He was fairly cack in the short space of time he was allowed in the match, but didn’t stamp on Robin and didn’t run up to any fans celebrating, so all in all he had a good game, morally. My favourite part of Scabbybayor’s return was that I’m the Bendtnerest Bendtner fan in the Bendtner fan club. When Scabby was still here at the Emirates last season lumbering around the pitch, pansying up and down doing bugger all and whinging at every moment he found available, there was Nick in the background, forever in Scabby’s moronic shadow. People didn’t like Nickybizzle because he was arrogant, so they thought. Yet, despite Scabby’s all-encompassing levels of pillockosity, they still found it in their lungs to sing “Adebayor, Adebayorrrrrr, give him the ball and he will scorrrrrrre” every time he got a tap-in. Nicklas got no credit and more often than not had to sit on the bench waiting for the 70th minute when Wenger would finally decide that once again Scabby had played like a muppet and it was time for reinforcements. But at the Ems (credit @FutureMrsAR16) on Saturday, there was a jolly little chorus of cheers every time Nick ran up the touchline warming up followed by a sweeping wave of boos as Scabby followed him. Would have been fun if Nick had just stuck his foot out a little bit too far as he galloped past him but I guess Nick is obviously that little bit more mature than me. Shame.

Anyway let’s move on now. I still don’t hate him as much as Cashley because he wasn’t a Gooner from birth and he has never gone on record saying he could never play for another team in England before hopping over to West London. Adebayor has also never met me and smiled a cheery little smile and said thank you when I met him in Pizza Express a year before he made the change and told him how thrilled Arsenal fans were that he was staying. The little git.

Eboue posters

There were two excellent ones. 1.) “Vote Eboue on May 6th” (I would love to hear his manifesto almost more than I love to see him dance) 2.) “Eboue is my homeboy” (actually, he’s everyone’s)

Silvestre performance

HOW good was Silvestre? It is widely believed (in my family at least) that he had the best game he’s ever had for us on Saturday. I’m sure the fact it was Manchester City helped him get all riled up but I also think it’s because he seems like a very intelligent man. He knew he had to step up his game, and step up his game he did.

Alex Song ‘lone wolf’

This was a name we came to over breakfast yesterday. Alex Song is a man you can rely on, even when all around him are losing their heads. He is the man who arrives at the Tube station at 4.55pm with a hot drink for you when you’ve told him to be there by 5pm. He is the man who has the fully-stocked First Aid kit in his car at all times, even though because he’s so reliable, his driving skills would never leave anyone needing a plaster. He does his job and he does it very, very well. Others can play right stinkers and Alex Song will still be there to pick up the pieces. He is also a man who needs to be called by his full name at all times. I love Alex Song.

Ref being a dick

I’m sorry but WHAT A PLANK. He was consistently useless. Every decision went the way of Manchester City and he doled out cards to us like they were going out of fashion. He even skilfully intercepted a pass between two Arsenal players at one point. Mike Dean brought being crap to new levels on Saturday, in a profession in which the levels of crap already often reach dizzying heights.

Shay Given injury

Poor Shay. He dislocated his shoulder after making a save on an Abou Diaby shot on goal and had to be replaced by the Faroe Islands’ no. 2 goalkeeper in the 70th minute of the match. He was roundly applauded as he came off but I don’t think he even noticed, such was the pain he was in. Poor sod. Wishing him a quick recovery, because the sooner he’s back the less they’ll think about Joe Hart, leaving us to swoop in at the 11th hour with a massive offer for him. I know this is about as likely as Barcelona deciding they’d like to join forces with Arsenal and create one giant superclub in which the long ball is outlawed, but it’s nice to dream.

Standard Sol brilliance

This is becoming as standard practice as Arsene Wenger starting a sentence with “Weeeellll…” but again, Sulzeer Jeremiah (Best. Name. Ever.) proved the ageists wrong with another flawless performance at the weekend. I think, besides being a fantastic player for Arsenal, Sol brings something extremely important to the team and that is the proof that anything is possible. We can no longer accept that Diaby just ‘had a bad game’ or that Denilson is just ‘going through a quiet period’ because the entire squad is younger than Sol. The reason he has been so brilliant is that he wants to be. When he beats an opponent to the ball, it’s not just blistering pace that gets him there, it’s the determination that he’s going to put the little git in his place and show him that Sol is still the daddy. He is a winner and a fighter and a leader and hopefully a real role model for his team mates. It’s vital he stays in the team next year but if he doesn’t, he still needs to stay in the set-up. While the fans adore Cesc as much as if he were their own son/brother/best friend/life-saving organ donor/god, he leads by example and that is about all he can do. His voice is not booming like Sol’s, he’s not built like a brick outhouse like Sol, he’s not Mr This-is-war-and-we-will-be-victorious like Sol. Sol’s intimidating enough to scare the younger lads into doing well but when someone like Nicklas scores, he congratulates them like he were their dad at parents’ evening afterwards. I don’t remember who it was against, but it was in one of the matches where Nick scored in the 175th minute. Sol had his arm around him telling him that he was ‘f***ing brilliant’. The day Sol Campbell tells me I’m ‘f***ing brilliant’ will be the day I feel I have won at life. Sol Campbell for England captain!

And that, dear readers (Mum/Dad/Evie/Lauren) is about all. Only two games left now, before the dullest part of the year commences. Sure, we have the World Cup but after that… *tumbleweed*

Bring on Barnet at Underhill!


  1. Teresa Ranscombe
    2766 days ago

    Dead right about Mike Dean being a plank and totally agree with the Sol Campbell bit. A good read as ever.


  2. Sebinho9
    2766 days ago

    Another awesome-o blog. : )

    We seem to be on the same page on most things.

    Then again, hating Adebayor and loving Sol is hardly a hotly disputed topic.

    Keep it coming and remember to check my blog!


  3. Sam H
    2766 days ago

    What’s happened to Diaby btw Sian? He was looking good earlier in the year…never heard naything good at all about Denilson, so no comment there!


  4. Louise
    2766 days ago

    Ooooo i’ve been mentioned :-)
    Sol was brilliant, don’t think anyone had a bad game, Greedy looked like a plank with his pigtails, Eboues homeboy got his shirt and a hug at the end, Ref was ridiculous and have you noticed Craig Bellamy has no neck?!!!!!


  5. sianyr
    2766 days ago

    @Mum Thanks Ma! Look, Louise agrees on your no-neck Bellamy comment!

    @baldgooner I read it and enjoyed it, again!

    @SamH He’s just gone a bit rubbish, is my highly professional, tactics-related opinion. Better on Sat, but still not showing the skill had been previously. Better get Sol to have a word.

    @Louise That’s exactly what my Mum said!


  6. Louise
    2766 days ago

    Great minds think alike :-) plus it’s true so we’re just stating a fact.


  7. oldbird
    2766 days ago

    HI Sian – a mutual friend passed on your bloglink to me – you will have to work out who now!!

    Tis a great read – not enough Arsebloggers on the distaff side so do keep it up. As entertaining and informed a goonersite as I have discovered recently – think you deserve a wider audience than family and friends – you are far far is better than a lot of the dross out there (ANR cough cough). Why not get linked to Newsnow – haven’t a clue how you go about that mind you but have contacts who blog daily so can’t be difficult. I am sure you would build up quite a following.

    Enjoyed your Barca too and your post-Wigan report almost made be smile in a very very non-smiley week. Good job.


    • sianyr
      2766 days ago

      Wow what a brilliant comment! Racking my brains as to who this could be now though! Thanks for the advice, I will look into it. Thanks so much again, this made my day!


  8. Sebinho9
    2766 days ago

    Thanks Siân. Please allow me to plug it on here?

    I would love to share some of your readers.



  9. Alan Ranscombe
    2766 days ago

    Amazingly, these blogs just keep getting better. I don’t know where you get it from,


  10. oldbird
    2766 days ago

    There’s a clue in the “old” bit – prob more a mutual friend of your M and D in reality (although we are all still 25 inside you have to understand). A highly goonerlicious and lovely person of your acquaintence.

    Go the gooner girls……….old and young!


    • sianyr
      2765 days ago

      I think I know who now and I believe the M&D saw them at the weekend! Yes, go the Gooner girls, always!


  11. Dollpet
    2765 days ago

    Great bloggy petal! x


  12. G Neilson (not the Man City goalkeeper!)
    2765 days ago

    Bril blog again. I don’t talk about the games anymore…I just hand out your blog! Right on all counts. Even with a first team fighting for places on the injury table, I still think we need to bring in some experienced players. Interested in your views on that? Thing of most concern to me was the performance of the ‘referee’. Sadly, I don’t think standards will improve until we’re allowed to give them brain transplants…and maybe Bellamy a neck at the same time. Keep spreading the word!


    • sianyr
      2765 days ago

      @G Neilson, (Arsenal legend, not Faroe Islands #2 keeper)
      Arsene definitely needs to bring some players in, and I don’t think the fans will put up with another year of him not doing so. The only winners we have on the team so far in terms of experience are Sol and Silvestre. And Clichy, a little bit, but he was about 12 when he won the League with us! It will hopefully be an interesting transfer season in terms of players coming in. Then again, last year all we bought was Vermaelen and I don’t think anyone would argue that was a bad purchase!
      With regards to the refereeing, am I alone in thinking a good idea would be some kind of league system? They get away with too many poor and important decisions on such a regular basis. If they do this consistently, they should go down the refereeing league and don’t get to referee big games until they step up their own game. Makes sense to me, but obviously not to the FA.

      I officially have a comment from a former Arsenal player on my blog now! Proud moment!


  13. Layla
    2765 days ago

    Great article, as always. I so agree with you on Alex Song, and Sol… oy, got to love Sol. I can’t help it, when I see his name in the line-up I feel a happy flutter in my tummy. As if everything is going to be okay, hahaha.


  14. oldbird
    2765 days ago

    Ok you’ve guessed it right methinks! Maybe our Arsefamilies will meet oneday by accident or happy design. Judging by your pics we were not far away at the Nou Camp (or Camp Nou as my Barca friends would say).

    Meanwhile keep up the excellent blogging. I occasionally dabble myself in a very inferior way.

    Re: your comments about referees above, after absolutely no reflection, I have concluded that the FA have no sense whatsoever and are only interested in anything to do with football if it involves making money out of TV and fans. You only have to look at the cock-up which is Wembley to see that. I agree standard of refereeing is appalling but not sure any better elsewhere frankly – judging by the terrible decisions in majority of CL games. Who’d want the job anyway?


  15. Yogesh
    2765 days ago

    Just read a bunch of your blogs which i had missed and i have to agree with your dad’s comment above, it just keeps getting better!

    BTW loved the Ade-BYE-Whore boos! Big thumbs up to all you folks in the stadium ( i guess not to you since you were giggling, ;-) )


  16. Tricia
    2759 days ago

    I love Sol. I want to give him a cookie (This is how I reward people, and by people I mean my little cousins). He’s awesome. Sol must stay.

    Great blog. *thumbs up*


    • Tural
      2009 days ago

      watched this 2 weeks ago and it was AMAZING, my first proper west end show, and its not going to be my last, auetlbosly LOVED IT , wish i could have seen it with idina mazel, and chenowerth, but the cast were awesome


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