Arsenal 4 – 0 Fulham. And breeeeeathe.

May 10, 2010 12 Comments by Sian

So that’s that then. I have The Carpenters’ Goodbye to Love stuck in my head. If I was bright enough to know how to embed music into a post, I’d stick the track on for your hearing pleasure as you read. But I’m not, so you know… Youtube it.

It’s apt though. Another season come and gone, lots of highs and plenty lows. Big wide grins and sad hunched shoulders. Occasions of “YEEEEEEEEES!!! GET IIIIIIIIIIN” and “Oh hell, are you having a laugh?” All for the love of one team and one team alone. The Arsenal. The Arse. The Gunners. Those Boys in Red and White.

Yesterday we rounded off the season with a comfortable 4-0 win over Fulham, the second classiest team in London, and a team who are now off on their jolly way to beat Atletico Madrid in Germany. Really hope they do as well. Mark Schwarzer had an uncharacteristically terrible first half at the Emirates but hopefully as Roy Hodgson said in his post-match interview, that’s that out of the way now and he will be back to his best on Wednesday.

I’ve always liked Fulham, possibly because Craven Cottage was the first away ground I ever went to, when we played them in the Premiership in 2003. Some bright spark started singing “Stand up if you hate Chelsea” and the entire stadium rose. Immature, petty and downright daft. But bloody funny.

It was very nervy for us in the first 20 or so minutes, knowing we had Tottenham breathing down our necks (grim image! Spurs breath ew ew ew! See former point about immature/petty/downright daft) but our nerves were put on ice for a while as Andrey Arshavin scored a great goal and managed to piss RVP right off at the very same time. It was a good goal, mostly made possible thanks to Schwarzer’s more than passable imitation of Gregor Samsa at the beginning of The Metamorphosis, but AA23 had his eye on goal and was NOT going to give the glory to anyone but himself. Fair play to the small Russian- he’s been getting a lot of stick the past few weeks what with all these phantom Barcelona quotes popping up here, there and everywhere and it was a nice way for him to silence his critics.

I do love that phrase: “getting a lot of stick”. Who else is now envisioning lumberjack Andrey, traipsing through the woods carrying vast amounts of branch and log? Just me then.

Anyway, five minutes later Theo Walcott made a great pass to RVP who nearly fluffed it, but then caught it on the rebound for a second attempt to put us 2-0 ahead. His celebration was to point straight at Theo as, fair enough, it was entirely Theo’s work that had created the goal. Couldn’t help but wonder if there was a bit of “Yes thank you, Theo, you know how to share. UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE.” *angry face at Andrey.*… involved. Boys have hissy fits too, you know.

Then, a little bit later on, Chris Baird scored a blinder! Unfortunately for him, it was in the wrong net. 3-0 Arsenal and lots of tee-heeing throughout the stadium. I think we finally recognised at this point that there was a chance we might just win the game. Carlos Vela added to our tally six minutes from the end with a pretty little chip over poor old Marky Mark and that was the game, dead and buried.

Tottenham lost 4-2 to Burnley, (feel free to take a second to laugh…) so all our work was for nothing as we ended up finishing comfortably third with the nearest team (them) five points behind us. The only pity of the day was having to see Beasthead Drogba lift the Premiership trophy. Whatever though, I am a big enough person to admit that they fully deserved it. Not a big enough person to not call Drogba ‘Beasthead’ though.

After the match the boys did their “Lap of Clap” where the likes of Bac, Eboue and RVP brought out Gorgeous Bubbas United for all us girls to squee over. Hey, they couldn’t provide us with any silverware but for now, the babies will do!

Follow the link for some photos of the match and the lap of appreciation, post-partido.

Prior to the game I met up with Seb of fame where we had a good chat about the season, our player of the season and the complete works of Solzhenitsyn. One of those is a lie. If you enjoy my blog, I suggest you head over to his as we seemed to share plenty of common thoughts, but he tends to be slightly more eloquent in his delivery of such thoughts than myself. I’m pretty sure that sentence was an excellent demonstration of grammar that is lacking, but that was obviously just to prove my point.

Tomorrow I will post some kind of cheerful end-of-season blog as it will be nice to remember the good times of the past nine months after the doomy-gloomy-down-down-grizzle we’ve become accustomed to over the past month or so. It’s easy to focus on the negative but I am back to being the Permanently Positive Polly you just want to smack most of the time, and I hope to bring you a post to smile at tomorrow.   

Also, if anyone has any thoughts as to the things I should write about over the tumbleweedfest that is the summer, I’d be much obliged if you’d give us a clue. World Cup ramblings will go somewhere else, but I’d like to try and keep this place alive in the mean time so… thoughts? Comments? Queries? Write to us at Nestle…

I’m kidding. Simply leave a comment below and thank you for helping my fledgling blog develop. It would be right rubbish if no one left comments at all, so ta very much.  :)


  1. larubia
    2723 days ago

    Your account of Andrey and RVP was so entertaining!
    And I’m all for Permanently Positive Polly :)


    • sianyr
      2723 days ago

      I’m glad! I know you’re that way about Real Madrid so we’re a kindred spirit in terms of both being Pollies! :)


  2. Alan Ranscombe
    2722 days ago

    Just keep up the Polliness, bird. I need a bit of optimism after the recent lows.


  3. Tricia
    2722 days ago

    Took a little bit longer than a second to laugh at Tottenham.

    Loved it. Can’t wait for the end of season blog.

    Also, during the WC you could possibly do a round up of the Arsenal boys playing for their countries. I don’t know. There’s not much to say.


    • sianyr
      2722 days ago

      @tricia Ooh that’s a good idea. As we are such a wonderfully international team there will be plenty of news to report! Excellent idea: Arsenal Watch, South Africa 2010!
      And yeah I think I underestimated with only a second to laugh at Tottenham-the-world-beating-superstars being beaten by newly-relegated-and-very-feisty Burnley.


  4. oldbird
    2722 days ago

    Hi Sian – Another great read. I really love your fiestinessness. A goonergirl after my heart. Will follow your blog during the summer (with some suggestions maybe if so inspired) and look forward to more pithy match reviews in our next (victorious – oh YES!) season.

    Still think you should find a way of getting a link on Newsnow feed. LadyArse is doing well and good to show the lads that we lasses know a thing or too (and can write better!). Do you Twitter?

    Meanwhile did you read this………? Made me laugh anyway


    • sianyr
      2722 days ago

      Hi again!
      I’m sure I’ll find something to write about over the summer, plus I liked Tricia’s idea above in the comments so there’ll be something to read on here! I do Twitter (I’m @SianyMacalarny- childhood nickname, don’t ask!) and in fact LadyArse has tweeted me a couple of times in the past… Was very proud as like you said she does a brilliant job of showing those blokes how it’s done!
      I hadn’t seen that Chelsea article but it’s spot-on (and hilarious.) I know they’re worthy winners but when I look back on their season all I can think is “Ancelotti looks like Michael McIntyre’s dad.”
      Whatever. Our season is coming. And it is up next!


  5. Gunner Neilson
    2722 days ago

    Can almost touch the sense of relief in your blog!! A bit of an anti-climax in the end but as soon as the final whistle went I found myself wishing the new season was upon us.
    Seconds to laugh at ‘Spurs?….make that minutes, at least!
    You could always follow Arsene’s visit(s) into the transfer market during the close season….leaving you PLENTY of time for other things.
    ‘Arsenal Watch, South Africa 2010′ is a great idea. As a Scotland fan I have no other interest in the World Cup!
    Been great reading and participating in your blogs. Thank you!


    • sianyr
      2722 days ago

      @GunnerNeilson Have you seen They’ve introduced a section called Transfer Linked to the site… The one place we can go to seek solace from all the rumours and they’ve added rumours to the official site!
      I think I’ll go with the Arsenal Watch idea. As an England fan, i’m sure I’ll only have an interest in the competition for so long before they get knocked out. Now how’s THAT for being a Positive Polly! (when Eastmond, Gibbs, Lansbury and Simpson are on the team, I’m sure we’ll be world beaters. :) )


  6. Rebecca Jill
    2721 days ago

    Your blog has been so enjoyable to read during this season. And Arsenal Watch during the World Cup sounds like an excellent idea. Even though I will be rooting for the U.S., I won’t be upset if Theo Walcott makes the England squad and scorches by Jonathan Bornstein, if he makes the squad and is playing at left back when the U.S. plays England. It can happen.

    With top U.S. players having been at and now at Fulham, I agree with you on the second classiest team in London. I was already an Arsenal fan when my beloved Brian McBride came to play at Fulham, and I was so proud of his success there, and now it’s the same with Clint Dempsey playing for them now. I will be rooting them on in their Europa League final today.

    I just love your commentary and insight on Arsenal, especially since you are at the home games and some away games and help make those of us who aren’t there, even those of us across the pond, feel like we were there, too.


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  2. [...] playing Fulham to round off the season for the second time in two years. Last season we beat them 4-0 at home and the blog went like [...]

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