Marvellous Merty, the intercepty delight.
If you care, I’m sorry for the blog silence of late. I think I’m going through a period of blog depression. Blogpression if you will. Every time I try to post one, I can’t and I angrily delete it all and I have no ideas for anything new or good, and I think I’ve lost my blog mojo… my blojo………. No, definitely my blog mojo, forever. Perhaps I have, because there’s no excuse for it given we’re all supposed be quite jolly at the moment. We’re winning – and drawing – and everything looks quite positive. All the faceaching going on back on 31st August all looks a bit silly now, given the status quo.
Of course, it’s too early to say that because who knows, maybe they’ll all get absolutely broken and we’ll end up calling Rami Shaaban back in for an emergency loan. Plus, at the end of this season, happy ever after or not, Thomas Vermaelen, the man who still happily talks to the badger with no loyalty, will leave us for £300,000 a week and then in two seasons’ time Wenger will blank him in the tunnel and he’ll act all hurt, like it wasn’t him who left the ship first. What a crap sentence that was, see, blog mojo is shot.
So, to get back on some sort of a track, yesterday we drew away at the ‘Champions’ Manchester City. I bloody hate that use of the word Champions, by the way. You’re champions for a summer and that’s it. Moving on, and the celebrations upon Laurent Koscielny’s goal were funny and brilliant. Some scoffed at them, but they represent the Daily Mail, so who’s losing at life really? It was definitely a deserved goal and I’m a bit miffed we didn’t win, actually. Nevertheless, we’re still on track for the Invincibles part two. Haha!
Still no first goal for Giroud. Well, he could have had one but Gervinho went all old skool Gervinho on us yesterday so he didn’t get a chance. Carl Jenkinson owned City in general, and they took to attacking him in order to stop him. Maybe writing about Carl will return me my mojo, as there is a really romantic lovely cartoon strip style story shaping up in his life. Til whoever’s richest comes calling in five years anyway.
Per Mertesacker was man of the match by some stretch, which is funny because he’s really tall so his stretches are super long. Thus that is one almighty stretch. You can’t not be pleased with him. He seems such a delightfully lovely man. I’m a big fat fairy pansy so that’s basically the most important thing to me anyway. I mean, I once tried loving a man with a big ugly streak of bastard running through him and I was successful for a while, but it turned out that that ugly streak was as enduring as grey hair, and ended up clouding over the rest of his personality like the big black cloud of depression until he ran away from my village and up to a different, more northern, more shit one where he could play with his golden dubloons and admire his new grey hair which he loved because it looked like platinum, and he loved platinum.
So, I would have taken loving Per the big lovely giant anyway, but now that he’s absolutely excellent, it’s just even easier. He makes interceptions like it aint no thang. As every other Arsenal blogger in the history of the world has said, he ‘reads the game very well’ and doesn’t need to be a vile old bastard centre half in doing so.
I think what’s good about our centre backs right now is the differences they all bring. Vermaelen is the tenacious, physical bulldog type. Mertesacker is the languid, intelligent greyhound, and Koscielny? Well, Koscielny doesn’t really fit anywhere, as Andi Thomas said not too long ago. But in fitting nowhere, he actually ends up completing this triumvirate of excellence. Absolutely not sure whether I used ‘triumvirate’ correctly there, but look at it sitting there shining like a beacon! Not forgetting Johan Djourou, who we all lost our spanners about losing to injury not so long ago. Terrible near anything wing shaped, but always important to have in the squad and I’m thrilled he remains. He’s another one who seems a lovely person, so he’s welcome aboard Team Sian’s Favourites any day.
Kieran Gibbs’s successful transformation from hopalong to standard first team starter has seen Andre Santos, the only player in the world worth really loving, pushed back onto the bench. Perhaps he could get a start against Coventry? Who knows, not I. Completing our back five thus far has been Vito Mannone. He howled a tad yesterday, but has otherwise looked a sturdy enough keeper and certainly not the bye-bye story we thought we’d seen last season. Hopefully the Loopy Pole will be back soon, allowing a healthy amount of competition to blossom in that position also.
My secondary man of the match yesterday had to be Aaron Ramsey. He’s had his doubters (all 5,683,271,932 of them) but yesterday was the best he’s looked for a while. Watch this. Moment 1.03 onwards is on Ramsey, but just watch it in general (warning: very sweary) Gervinho Gervinhoed a beautiful pass from him early on, and it set the tone for the rest of his day (and Gerv’s unfortunately). I really think Rambo will be captain of Arsenal one day. Everyone else seems to think Jack, but I’m not so sure.
Another talking point in yesterday’s match seems to have been this zonal marking/man marking debate. Nothing makes my eyes glaze over more. I know it’s a sin, I am a woman battling my way through the mannish jungle of football armed with nothing but a spatula and some mozzie spray, so how can I admit to not wishing to get involved in chalkboard talk? Well, besides the fact it often confuses me about as much as long division, I just basically think that either you play well or you play shit. And if you’re playing shit, well you’d just better run a bit faster and stop being pushed off the ball like a worthless marshmallow. Try a bit harder. It’s very simple.
Anyway, enough droning on in this directionless fashion. Apologies for the lack of blogging, and that the quality here is so poor, but I hope to take inspiration from our promising looking little team and push on from this to better things next time.